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The War on Christmas Is Over! Bring on the Toilet Wars!

Larry Nocella
4 min readDec 24, 2024

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We were too late to stop the imaginary “War on Christmas” and the real damage it did. Can we apply the lessons learned to the ramping up Toilet Wars?

Christmas Wars veteran emerges from a toilet ready to do more battle.

The Jerkiest of Jerks

It’s no secret this world is full of jerks. Jerks of all kinds. At the top of the scale, the jerkiest of the jerky, are those that exploit kindness. I mean those who pretend to be in distress, then when a passerby tries to help, the criminal strikes, robbing (or doing something worse to) the kind soul.

Those goons achieve peak jerkitude because they not only harm their victim, but they create a world frightened to help out a stranger. They steal kindness from us all.

That is why I hold a special place of distaste for Bill O’Reilly. Who?

Younglings may not remember this clown, but for a while, he was a popular example of that awful breed, the Culture Warriors. He was that type of person — a type that sadly has become more numerous — who complains about things that are individual choices and really none of anyone else’s business. Or they complain about entertainment and entertainers, trashing people and events with no genuine civic power.

Fake Culture Wars vs Real Class Wars

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Larry Nocella
Larry Nocella

Written by Larry Nocella

Author. Mental Models. Future-thinking. A.I. Speculative Fiction. Digital Marketing. Software Dev. It's all fascinating to me. Visit LarryNocella.com.

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